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Halloween: Dancing loners reach critical mass on town steps

It’s that time of year when parents dress their children in disguise, tell them there’s no such thing as monsters and send them out into the night to beg for sweets from strangers on their doorsteps.

This Halloween has seen several dozen edgy free-thinkers with a bit of a dark side go to town dressed as 2019’s Joker.

A mob of such loners formed on the North Pier steps, each refusing to wait his turn to dance as that would be playing into society’s broken traditions.

The Red Cross has seen a record week for sales of oversized burgundy suits in preparation for this accidental flash mob.

Many young women went out in lingerie to emulate cats – nature’s sexiest animal.

“I know I get a thicky whenever I see a cat,” barman Zach Boscher claimed.

A 22-year-old trainee named Neil managed to ruin a perfectly good work drinks by claiming he came dressed as Neil.

It was a mess of a night in St Peter Port; although rotting flesh, fangs and blood were on display as usual at the Albion.

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